Little Miss Muffett

Please accept my most humble obeisances. As explained before, I am simply microbial enzyme in intestinal lining of the worm which is in the stool.

All right. Hare Krishna. Due to Overwhelming Popular Demand, we are herewith presenting new installment of Vaishnava Version of the Nursery Rhyme (see below)

“LITTLE MISS MUFFET”
by Yama Niyama Dasa Brahmachari (YNDB), the duly initiated disciple of His Holiness Bhakti Mayapur Mahaprabhu Maha-mantra Maharaja (BMMMMM) of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness (ISKCON).

Got it?

OK, now pay attention:

“Little Miss Muffet . . .”

First thing is, name like “Muffet” does not inspire confidence, since in English “muff it” means to fail miserably. Anyway, brahmachari should not even think about opposite sex, what to speak of make poem. I only mention for instructional purposes.

“Sat on the Tuffet . . .”

“Tuffet” is old-fashioned mleccha way to say “asana.” We do not know whether she was Sitting Properly. Probably not.

“Eating the curds and the whey . . .”

Safe to assume such foodstuff was not offered to Lord Krishna, therefore simply Lumps Of Sin, therefore we know only bad thing is going to happen.

“Along came one Spider and sat down beside her . . .”

Yes, material world means danger at every step.

And because no one did know whether to say “Look out, Mataji!” or, “Look out, Prabhu!”, spider bit her and she died.

THE END

PURPORT:

My Guru Maharaja, His Holiness Bhakti Mayapur Mahaprabhu Maha-mantra Maharaja, says, “Every man must be trained in the brahmachari life to see all women as mother. Real problem is not whether to say ‘Prabhu’ or ‘Mataji.’ Real problem is there are no actual brahmachari.'”
Your servant, Yama Niyama Dasa Brahmachari