Humpty Dumpty

Why do so many so-called “adults” go to the so-called “adult bookstore?” I will tell you. First of all, such place should actually be called “less-than-animal bookstore,” but it is also proven fact that so many rascal adults start out as rascal children, reading equally useless “children’s book,” instead of the transcendental literature.

What is use of Mother Goose and fairy story like cow jumping over moon? Moon is heavenly planet and not even so-called cosmonaut can go there what to speak of the domestic animal. So many “Nursery Rhyme” are all simply idiotic nonsense polluting impressionable brain of small child with crazy ideas that remain for whole life, so that brain becomes repository of nonsensical ideas like dish running away with the spoon. This is very bad.

So, we have decided to make our own Vaishnava Version of “Nursery Rhyme,” because Krishna consciousness means to be merciful to the Less Intelligent Nondevotee Rascal With The Poor Fund of the Knowledge. It is our latest mission to create revolutionary new literature for the younger generation of Rascal.

And because we are doing this as service to Vaishnava community, we are welcoming your suggestions for future volumes. Here is one small sample, which we hope you will enjoy and also teach to your Little Pure Devotee (if applicable):

“HUMPTY DUMPTY”

A Vedic Version (VV) on the Philosophical significance of the Western So-Called Nursery Rhyme by Yama Niyama Dasa Brahmachari (YNDB), the Duly Initiated Disciple of His Holiness Bhakti Mayapur Mahaprabhu Maha-Mantra Maharaja (BMMMMM)

“Humpty Dumpty . . .”

You know, in Vedic system of name giving, person gets name based on his qualities. Like the Hiranyakashipu; hiranya means the gold, and kashipu means the soft bed, for the sex life. Such materialistic demons are killed by nails of Lord, Who is pulling intestines from abdomen so that blood is flying everywhere. So, with name like Humpty Dumpty, we know right away we are dealing with similar mentality—simply interested in the sex life and passing stool.

” . . . Sat on the wall . . .”

And, why is he sitting on the wall? Wall is not for sitting; that is very bad idea. But this tells us he is very much Marginal Energy of Lord, situated in precarious place, as we will find out.

” . . . Humpty dumpty had one great fall . . .”

Big surprise.

“All the kings horses and all the kings men could not put Humpty Dumpty together again . . .”

Yes. No amount of material administration can give life to the dead body, but such fall could have been avoided by not overindulging in gratification of tongue, belly and genitals. Bottom line purport? Stay brahmachari.

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